File Under: WTF?

Wendy’s manager shot over chili sauce

Drive-through customer gets angry about denial of extra condiments

The Associated Press

Updated: 10:44 a.m. ET May 31, 2007

MIAMI - A Wendy's manager was shot several times in the arm early Tuesday trying to protect the restaurant's chili sauce, authorities said.

A man in the drive-through argued with an employee because he wanted more of the condiment, police said. The worker told the customer that restaurant policy prohibited a customer from getting more than three packets.

The man insisted on 10, reports said. The employee complied, but police said the customer wanted more.

When the manager came out to speak to the man, the customer shot the manager, Miami-Dade police spokeswoman Mary Walters said. He was taken to Ryder Trauma Center at Jackson Memorial Hospital with non-life threatening injuries, police said.

The shooter fled with a female passenger.

"I did not know I got shot," store manager Renal Frage told WTVJ-TV in Miami. "When I went back to the office, I saw blood pumping out of my arm, and I was shocked. I was checking myself out and couldn't believe I got shot over some chili sauce."

Frage added: "I got shot over chili sauce. I was trying to figure while in the hospital why someone would shoot me over some chili sauce."

I really don't know what to say about this.  I've gotten hacked at the drive-thru, but I've never thought about shooting the person at the drive-thru window nor the manager.  Take today, for instance.  I ran down the street to our local Wendy's to pick up something for lunch.  The drive-thru was unusually long, and there no cars in the parking lot so I parked and went inside to order.  I specifically asked the girl behind the counter for a "hand full" of ketchup.  She put 3 packets in my bag.  Not once did the thought enter my mind to shoot her.  

As for the limits on packets of condiments, there are no signs at our local Wendy's saying there is a ten packet limit on the hot sauce for the chili.  Maybe the guy should have sued Wendy's instead of shooting the manager.   

Age Is Just A Number

I just returned from a spur-of-the-moment visit at Diva Stacy's home.  She had one of the worst days in her tenure at AAA, and she was in need of rescuing.  What better to put her in a good mood than watching our favorite videos on You Tube.  Actually, I believe the Patron that I brought helped, too, but Tiny Elvis and Pearl The Landlord made us both laugh.  After we watched our favorite joke videos, I started looking for some music videos, and we watched about an hour's worth of Ann and Nancy Wilson from the Divas' favorite rock group Heart.  We watched a concert video clip from 2000, and then took a walk down memory lane and watched some clips from 1977.   As we were starting the second video from 1977, it dawned on us both that that was thirty years ago.  It seemed like yesterday that we were down in Diva Stacy's basement listening to our Heart records as we sang along and played the guitar with the records. 

She had an awesome stereo, and we would crank it up as we played "Barracuda" and "Crazy On You."  I wasn't content to just sing along - I would lug over my first amplifier and my guitar and I would play along with the records as we sang.  Actually, before I had my license, one of the 'Rents would drive me and my gear over. But I digress.  Were quite good for teenagers, I have to say.  Our love for music was one of the things that made the Divas become friends back in the day, and it's a thread that has been woven into our lives ever since.  But it seemed weird tonight to think that we first listened to Heart thirty years ago.  It sure doesn't seem that long ago.

I know we're not kids any more; hell, we're what most people consider middle-age.  But we still had a hard time comprehending that it was thirty years ago.  But we don't feel middle-age.  I'd bet that most twenty-something girls could not have kept up with our pace at this January's DLV2 trip.  I don't know too many that could have worked a full day at the office, came home and packed, slept for only a few hours because they were so excited, flew to Las Vegas, and stay up for over 24 hours. We can do anything that the young girls can do; only we need a nap. 

 

And They Didn't Live Happily Ever After

Like millions of other TV viewers, I watched the season finale of "The Bachelor" this last Monday night.  I'm terrible for feeling this way, but I've always watched the final episode of "The Bachelor" just to see how the bachelor dumps the girl that he doesn't choose to live happily ever after with.  There's usually lots of tears and this week's finale was no exception.  I know that sounds cold and heartless, but hey - it's not nearly as heartless as telling someone on nationwide TV "I don't want to live happily ever after with you." 

For some reason, Americans are fascinated by "The Bachelor" and its sister show "The Bachelorette."  The shows get very high Neilson ratings, so even if people don't openly admit that they watch, the ratings prove otherwise.  My guess is that we watch it so we can see the beginning of a "happy ever after."  I did some research and discovered there haven't been too many happily-ever-afters among the bachelors and bachelorettes.  Out of the 12 previous seasons of the two shows (not including the season that ended this week) there are only 3 surviving couples:  Charlie O'Connell and Sarah Brice, Byron Velvick and Mary Delgado, and Trista Rehn and Ryan Sutter.  The happy-ever-after rate comes to 25% - one out of four.  That's not very good odds for Andrew Baldwin, this season's bachelor and Tessa Horst, the woman that he chose and even proposed to during the season finale. 

During the final episode, Tessa said that if she wasn't chosen, she couldn't go back to the life that she lived before she met Andrew.  I translated that to mean "If he doesn't pick me, it's the end of the world."  Tessa is a social worker, but after hearing her say that, it seems to me she might be in need of social guidance herself for some apparent self-worth issues.  I did a little more research, and found out that "The Bachelor" was filmed over a six-week period.  That means that during just six short weeks, this guy weeded one woman out of twenty-five, and fell in love with her and asked her to marry him.  And in that same six week period, Tessa fell in love with him and told him she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him.  Yep, this happened in a mere six weeks.  Some of you are probably saying "Now, Puddin, quit being a hardass and let them live happily ever after."  But I have a hard time believing that in just six weeks, all of that can happen.  I just don't think you can know that the other person is the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with after just six weeks.  Maybe I'm wrong, and I should be using my parents to prove that I'm wrong -- on my parents' first date, Dad told Mom that she was going to marry him.  She laughed at him and told him he was crazy.  They'll celebrate their 49th anniversary next month. 

Happy Memorial Day

Yesterday, my Mother experienced a first - she attended her first Bats baseball game.  A co-worker had the company tickets for yesterday's game and couldn't attend so she gave them to me, and since Mom had never attended a Bats game, I surprised her and took her down to Slugger Field.  We got there just as they'd opened the gates so we would get one of the cool camo Bats baseball caps they were giving to the first 2,500 people.  Then we walked around the stadium so she could grasp the whole ballpark experience. While walking, we saw some VFW friends.  The VFW state color guard was there to present the flags at the opening ceremony of the game, and we chatted for a few moments with them before going to our seats. While we all were talking, we saw a hundreds of soldiers in their [hot] long-sleeve camo fatigues come marching in.  In keeping with tradition, Slugger Field honors the troops on Memorial Day, and all military personnel get in free.  So every Memorial Day, they have dozens of buses full of the boot camp soldiers come here from Ft. Knox to enjoy the game. 

Slugger Field also kept on with another Memorial Day tradition - they honored Robley Rex, Kentucky's only living WWI veteran.  Mr. Rex is a spry 106 years old, and still volunteers every week day at the VA hospital here in Louisville.  I had the priviledge of meeting Mr. Rex last summer when I attended the state VFW convention, and it was truly a honor.  Mr. Rex had been at the Memorial Bats games ever since I can remember, and this year he was there in style.  They rode him around the perimeter of the field in a cart similar to the Pope-mobile.  He also got a standing ovation from the entire stadium.  When the cart reached the part of the stadium where the hundreds of soldiers were, the driver stopped the cart and all of the solders stood at attention and saluted him.  It took a minute or so, but Mr. Rex got out of the cart and stood before all of those soldiers and saluted back.  From our vantage point, there weren't too many dry eyes in the stadium when that happened; I'm first to admit my Oakly sunglasses were fogging up. 

Unfortunately, the Bats lost the game (they got pounded into the ground and lost 9-2) but Mom and I had a great mother-daughter outing.  And the highlight of the game was seeing the soldiers salute Mr. Rex.  That's what Memorial Day is about. 

Link Of The Week

After chatting with some faithful readers at work, I found out that not everyone thought that the Will Ferrell "The Landlord" video was as funny as I thought it was.  I concede.  I still think the video ranks up as a close second to the video of the monkeys in a bar telling the penguin joke.  YouTube quickly took off "The Landlord" but you can still find the video at FunnyOrDie.com.  But I digress.  As I said, I still think the video is hilarious, and this week I set out on a mission to figure out how to download the video to my computer and iPod.  It didn't take long before I found a program that will do both.  The program is called Ares Tube and it's so easy to use, even I downloaded it and the videos play flawlessly on my iPod.  Just visit http://www.benjaminstrahs.com/itube.php and downlod the program and then you'll be on your way to making your own best of video compilation from You Tube or other video sites.  And one more note of importance about this site -- I ran the spyware and my antivirus scan on the download before I opened the file and it's safe to download.

What's In A Name?

I've heard some very bizarre first names in my 40+ years. Some of the more unusual ones are two Ladies Auxiliary women named Travis and Toby.  I know a little girl named Justice, and a few girls named after the seasons - Summer and Autumn.  I also know a few boys named after states - Dakota, Wyoming, and Washington.  I thought I'd heard it all in the names department until this morning.  Mom sent me up to the good ol WC Lounge (aka White Castle) to pick up a bag of burgers for lunch.  I was standing at the counter waiting for my order when I heard a young woman behind me start yelling "Trapper, get back here."  At first, I thought she had snuck a dog inside the White Castle and was yelling at him for running off.  I glanced in her direction and discovered that she was yelling at her son named Trapper.

As a first name for a child, "Trapper" is definitely a new one on me.  Now for you MASH fans, it's not uncommon - we all remember Trapper John from the show.  But that was a nickname that the other doctors and personnel at the MASH unit gave him.  I can only hope that this was a nickname that family members gave this kid, because I would hate to go through life with the first name of Trapper.  It's like a name you'd expect an old mountain man on a rerun of "Gunsmoke" or "Grizzly Adams" to have - not a little boy. 

Flashback Friday

We have some very interesting and diverse conversations in our lunchroom at work; some of which I can't repeat here in TWIT.  But most of them are very interesting and entertaining.  Today during lunch, a co-worker was talking about a cartoon he watched as a young boy.  He's 32 years old - a Generation X kid - and on more than one occasion I've had to stop and explain something I was talking about because he's too young to remember.  Well today, he stumped me - he was talking about a cartoon that I'm too old to remember.  Truthfully, he can't remember it either.  So we're asking for you, faithful readers, to help us out and see if you remember what cartoon he's thinking about.  I'm afraid we don't have much to go on except for these few clues:

There were 5 characters:
The leader  - he was white, and flew a jet like an F16
Another guy - he was blue, and he had a race car
Girl - she was pink, and had either a motorcycle or a helicopter
Big Goofball guy - Kind of like Shaggy from Scooby Do
Little monkey guy  (Goofball Guy's sidekick)

If any of you remember this cartoon from the 80's, please leave comments and let us know what it is.  I don't even know where you would begin on doing a Google search for this.  I hope someone loves trivia as much as me, and can give the answer. There's no prize involved, but you will get props in TWIT. 

Live To Ride

I'm very happy to report that tonight, I attended my second Bike Night.  First of all, let me say I'm sorry that I didn't take my camera so I could document the evening; I promise I'll get pictures the next time I attend.  But just like the first Bike Night I attended two years ago, this was very badass. 

This Bike Night is one of the biggest held in the city - I'm not a good estimator, but I'll take a stab and say that when I left the Bike Night after the first hour of the event, there was over 400 bikes there.  I went from Bike Night over to the VFW to conduct some Ladies Auxiliary business, and when I left there at about 9:00, I saw probably the same amount of bikes - if not more - about a block away from the VFW at the cool hangout The Swamp.  To see just a sea of motorcycles of every shape, size and brand was a feeeling I just can't describe.  And I'm not a diehard bike fan, either; I can't imagine how a hardcore motorcycle fan would react to seeing that many motorcycles in one place. 

This Thursday night Bike Night was held in the parking lot by the Texas Roadhouse steakhouse and the recently closed Dillards shopping center.  So with the store closed, there's plenty of space for bikes.  I met a few co-workers and one VFW member there, and I have to say I had an awesome time.  Everyone was so friendly and welcoming to me.  Men and women that I'd never met before were patting me on the shoulder or arm and saying "hi" to me.  And I'm proud to report that I had several invitations for rides on very badass bikes, too; all of which I turned down because I had some business to conduct at the VFW.  But I felt very honored that an obvious outsider like me would be made to feel at home. 

When I got home tonight, I spent fifteen minutes telling the 'rents about the cool time at Bike Night, and told them I'd be taking them up there the next time I could attend.  Dad has a Harley t-shirt and Mom has an American flag t-shirt that they can wear and feel a part of it all.  You can rest assured that I'll have my camera that night to document the evening.  Until then, live to ride, ride to live.

File Under: WTF?

                                                  60-year-old N.J. woman delivers twins

Believed to be the oldest mom in the U.S. to give birth to multiples

The Associated Press

Updated: 9:47 a.m. ET May 23, 2007

TRENTON, N.J. - A 60-year-old woman became a mother, twice over, when she delivered a pair of boys Tuesday.

Frieda Birnbaum gave birth to “Baby A” at 12:44 p.m. and “Baby B” a minute later by Caesarean section at Hackensack University Medical Center, hospital spokeswoman Nancy Radwin said. The twins each weighed 4 pounds, 11 ounces, she said.

“The mom is in recovery, and she and the babies are doing really well,” Radwin said, declining a request to speak with the mother.

Hospital officials believe Birnbaum may be the oldest woman to give birth to twins in the United States, Radwin said.

Birnbaum, a psychologist from Saddle River, underwent in-vitro fertilization last year in Cape Town, South Africa, at a center that specializes in older women. She and her husband, Ken, a New York attorney, have been married for 38 years and have three other children — sons ages 6 and 33 and a daughter, 29.

Birnbaum told Fox News she wanted her younger son to have siblings closer to his age and wanted to remove some of the stigma attached to older women giving birth.

Coincidentally, Tuesday was the birthday of twins born one year ago to a 59-year-old woman — also to a New Jersey woman. Lauren Cohen gave birth to Gregory and Giselle on May 22, 2006, at New York Presbyterian Hospital/Columbia.

Cohen said Birnbaum contacted her after seeing her name in a magazine and that the two quickly became friends.

“We talked about babies; I suggested things that would be helpful whenyou try to feed two babies simultaneously,” Cohen said.

                                                                                                                                                    The only thing I can say about this is may the good Lord help her. 

                                                                                                                                 

 

Gas Price Update

Gas prices are still at an all-time high here in the 'Ville - $3.31-$3.39 a gallon, depending on which part of the county you're in.  It's just beyond outragious, if you as me.  One of my cousins, who happens to be one of the city's best car mechanics, gave us some advice this weekend.  He fixed our rototiller last week, and when he brought it back (in excellent working condition, I might add) he said that the problem was the gas that it had been using.  He went on to say that in lieu of the $$$ fuel injector and fuel pump repairs that I had on the Blazer a few weeks ago, that we should be using the non-reformulated gas in our vehicles and lawn equipment.  Jefferson County has the reformulated gas, but just miles away down Dixie Highway in Hardin County in the scenic river town of West Point, you can get the non-reformulated gas. 

I'd heard friends and neighbors say that for years, they'd made the 10+ mile trek to West Point to get gas because not only was it better for your cars, but it was also cheaper.  I'd thought it was just an urban legend until my cousin gave us the info last week.  So today after work, I headed out to West Point to fill up the Blazer and see for myself.  Sure, it was a tad bit farther than I'd care to go to get gas (it was exactly 13 miles from the gas station to The Compound) but the gas there was 20 cents cheaper per gallon then is it a half mile up the road.  Plus it's the good non-reformulated gas. 

I'll keep track of my milage, and when I fill up again I'll report what my miles per gallon was.  Then when I fill up again, I'll get gas in my 'hood and compare the two.  I'm anxious to see if my milage is better.  But even if the milage is about the same, I'll probably continue to get my gas at West Point just because it's not reformulated.  I need all the help I can get with my two old cars.

No, Your Eyesight Isn't Playing Tricks On You

The folks at AOL are at it again - they've been working for the past week on the AOL Journals, and have added some "enhancements", if you will.  Among the changes are the way that you, my faithful readers, view the photographs that I post in TWIT.  Before, they would be just the normal way - in the center of the box, or frame, as the AOL people call it.  Since the enhancements, photographs now are zoomed in, zoomed out, and basically are all over the place.  I really don't care for this enhancement; it gives me a headache trying to look at a picture.  And from the emails I've received, my faithful readers don't care for it as well.  But never fear - AOL's people are working on this and they've promised to give us bloggers the capability of having our photographs the old way.  So please bear with me until this is fixed.  I'll try not to post any photographs until this is fixed. 

Link Of The Week

When Diva Stacy sent me this link a week ago, I have to honestly say that I didn't look it for a day or two. In the email she said it starred Will Ferrell, and not being a Will Ferrell fan, I kinda dawdled around before I watched it. After one time, I thought "Well, it's not all that funny."  But then I watched it one time, and then one more time, and then one more time, and then I was hooked.  I have to say that this is in my top three funniest online videos I've ever seen.  Check it out for yourself at:  http://www.funnyordie.com/v1/view_video.php?viewkey=3efbc24c7d2583be6925.  If you're not hooked on it the first time like I was, just give it another time or two and you'll be rolling like I was. 

Cooking At The Compound

Last night was the annual VFW and Ladies Auxiliary officers installation ceremony at VFW Post 5421, and we had quite a spread for the dinner following the ceremony.  The canteen manager, Paulie, cooked some awesome ribs outside on the grill, and used his top secret barbeque sauce.  Well, I guess it's not all that secret, since he told Mom what was in it.  We also had great fried chicken and quite a variety of side dishes.  One of my favorite little old ladies in the Auxiliary, Bert, made an awesome dish called Dorito Casserole, and let me tell you it rocked.  She called me this morning with the recipe and I just have to share it with you. 

Dorito Casserole

Casserole Ingredients:

1 large 13-ounce package of nacho Doritos (save 2 cups for casserole topping)
2 tbsp. onion, grated
1 10-ounce can of chili with beans
10- to 15-ounce can of enchilada sauce
8-ounce can of tomato sauce
1½ cups of shredded sharp cheddar cheese

Topping Ingredients:

2 cups Doritos
1/2 cup of shredded cheddar cheese
1¼ cups of sour cream

Casserole Directions:

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
Crumble 6 cups of Doritos with your hands into a large mixing bowl.
Add the onion, the chili, the enchilada sauce, tomato sauce and 1½ cups of cheddar cheese to the crumbled Doritos. Stir with a rubber spatula to combine. Place mixture into an 8½ x 11-inch oven-proof casserole dish and bake for 20 minutes.
Remove from the oven. Spread the sour cream over the top of the casserole with a large spoon or rubber spatula.
Top with remaining 2 cups Doritos. Then sprinkle with the 1/2 cup of the cheddar cheese.
Bake for another five minutes and serve.

Flashback Friday

Track listing:

1.  The Looking Glass - Brandy
2.   Daniel Boone - Beautiful Sunday
3.   Lighthouse - Sunny Days
4.   Mouth and MacNeil - How Do You Do
5.   Hollies - Long Cool Woman
6.   Donny Osmond - Go Away Little Girl
7.   O'Jays - Backstabbers
8.   Raspberries - Go All The Way
9.   Andy and David Williams - Fly Pretty Baby
10. Rod Stewart - Maggie May
11. Bobby Vinton - Sealed With A Kiss
12. Cher - Gypsies, Tramps and Theives
13. Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show - Sylvia's Mother
14. Donny Osmond - Sweet And Innocent
15. Argent - Hold Your Head Up
16. Eric Clapton - Let It Rain
17. Slade - Mama Weer All Crazee Now
18. Bulldog - No
19. Five Man Electrical Band - Money Back Guarantee
20. Rick Springfield - Speak To The Sky
21. Albert Hammond - Down By The River
22. Gallery - I Believe In Music

Lost Shirt Update

I'm very happy to report that the lost tie-dyed Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame t-shirt has been found.  Someone must have snuck into the house and crept down the hall to my bedroom and slipped into my closet when I wasn't looking.  I'm happy now. 

Has Anyone Seen My Shirt?

I get so frustrated whenever I lose something. But given my track record, this happens just about every week.  I guess I just have too much stuff.  But I digress. I'm frustrated right now because I've spent the last half hour looking for my very cool tie-dyed t-shirt from the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame.  I've gotten quite a few compliments when I wear it, because on the back it says "If it's too loud, you're too old."  I know it's here at The Compound somewhere, but I just can't find it.  It's not that I wanted to wear it tomorrow - I just wanted to know where it is. 

I'm sure that makes no sense but I'm like that.  I'll think of something I haven't seen or used in awhile, and then go on a massive search and rescue mission in the house looking for it, just because I want to see it and want to know where it is; not because I want to use it.  I'm going to go search some more in my closet and in the basement during the commercial breaks during "Ugly Betty."  I'll keep you posted on my search and rescue mission. 

Records Are Made To Be Broken

Yesterday was a record breaking day in Louisville.  In case you didn't come out of the house yesterday, nor turned on the TV, gas prices jumped to a record high of $3.39 a gallon in Louisville.  Everybody you talked to was hacked off - and rightly so.  Gas was over 35 cents more per gallon than it was a week ago.  Or even a day ago.  I don't know what the true reason is - I'm sure it has something to do with the refineries or global warming or the coming spring elections. 

With gas prices at an all-time high in Louisville, our friendly Krogers are doing their part - in today's Curious Journal, Krogers had a full page ad reminding people that if they use their Krogers card, they can get 3 cents off per gallon at the Krogers gas stations.  Well whoop-tee-doo.  With gas inching towards three and a half bucks a gallon, like 3 cents off a gallon is going to make any difference?  Nice try, Krogers, but it doesn't work.  Three cents less beats paying three cents more, but when gas prices are so high right now, that doesn't seem to matter.  Maybe they'd be better off giving us three cents off per gallon of milk. 

Life Changing Decisions Made At The Mexican Restaurant

The 'rents and I had a great dinner at our favorite 'hood Mexican restaurant today.  The place wasn't crowded, the food was awesome and the price was very cheap (only $5.99 for their all-you-can-eat buffet).  We sat at a booth, and I had a clear view of a table in front of the restaurant.  It was about 20 feet away, and while I wasn't eavesdropping, I could hear just about everything that was said.  Seated at that table was a woman in her fifties, and three young teenage girls, each with a tiny baby. One of the young girls also had a little boy, about a year old.   About half-way through our meal, another woman in her forties came in and sat down at the table. They had finished eating, and the woman was asking each girl some questions and filling out paperwork.  I heard the woman tell the girls that she would bring a baby carrier the next time she saw them, and then she went on to ask more questions.  When she asked one of the girls her baby's birthdate, I almost fell out of my seat when she said "May 7, 2007."  Yes, this young mother - a kid herself - was out at a Mexican restaurant with her week-old baby.  

We continued eating and I kept on listening and watching, and it didn't take me long to figure out actually what was going on.  The older woman was there getting information from the girls and them and their babies in an effort to get the babies adopted.  My suspiscion was confirmed when the woman in her forties picked up a bottle and started feeding one of the babies and talking to it and said "I'll sure be glad when they get you a new mommy. Grandma is tired of all of this."

I've witnessed drama, arguments and even a fight or two while dining out at restaurants.  I've witnessed people getting upset and crying, and I've seen people behave like total asses, but I have to say I've never witnessed anything like this before in a restaurant.  Nor do I think I'll ever seen anything like it again.  It was almost sureal - there before my very eyes, these three young girls were making arrangements to give up their babies for adoption.  On TV and the movies, that usually happens in a hospital room before or after a young girl has her baby, or in a downtown clinic while anti-abortion protesters are maching outside.  But here at the Mexican restaurant, while the rest of us were making a decision about whether or not we wanted a second plate of food, these girls were making a decision that would change their lives.

Something You Don't See Everyday

I was on my way home from work this afternoon when I witnessed Something That You Don't See Everyday.  It might even fall into the category of "Something You Don't See" period.  As I was driving down busy traffic-filled Cane Run Road, I came across a man driving a riding lawn mower. He wasn't up on the sidewalk, nor was he mowing the grass by the road - he was driving it along with the regular traffic.  He was in front of the car in front of me, and instead of getting in the left lane to pass him, I stayed in the right lane just to see what he was going to do.  Imagine my surprise when he pulled into the Cork 'n' Bottle liquor store.  Imagine my further surprise when he pulled up at the drive-thru window. 

By the time he pulled into the liquor store, he was about 4 or 5 cars ahead of me, so I would have had ample time to pull out the cell phone and take a picture of him with my camera phone, but believe me when I tell you that I was stupified and was unable to focus my attention on the phone to even take the picture.  I could do nothing but just stare in disbelief.  Never in my life would I even imagined seeing a man on a riding lawn mower going through the drive-thru window at the liquor store. But I will say that it reminded me of a story I read years ago back in the 70s. A true story, in fact.  The First Lady Of Country Music, Miss Tammy Wynette, was married to George Jones, and after an argument about his drinking, she hid the keys to their cars. George wanted to get his drink on, so he got on the riding lawn mower and rode it to town. 

 

Happy Mothers Day

A week ago, I asked Mom what she would like to do for Mothers Day -- the sky was the limit.  Some mothers would have said "Take me to X Restaurant for dinner" or "Get me a dozen of Y flowers."  She didn't hesitate to say "I'd like to fix some chicken in the rotisserie and have Lenora and Polly and Dr. Joe for dinner after church."  I ask you - could that request have been any more unselfish?  It's yet one more example of my Mother's giving and unconditional love for her friends.  Not a day goes by that I don't pray that I'm one tenth of the kind, giving person my mother is.

TWIT would like to wish a very happy Mothers Day to all of the women faithful readers that are reading this.  Even though you might not be a dictionary "mother", there's not a woman out there that doesn't have people that look up to her and that look to her for advice, guidance, or a shoulder to lean on.  To all of the women that read this, I salute you. 

Link Of The Week

We all like to think we're smart - smarter than the average bear, so says Yogi.  But at any rate, we like to think we're smart.  Someone sent me a link this week to a short test you can take, and you can see just how smart you are.  Visit http://www.flashbynight.com/test/ and see how you do.  Don't take too long with your answers, because the test is timed.  Take the test, and send a link to your friends and then you can see if you're smarter than them. 

Filming At The Compound

In case you didn't know, a good portion of the movie "Elizabethtown" was filmed here in the 'Ville and 30 miles south in Elizabethtown.  But we've discovered more movie making going on right here at The Compound.  From the looks of the video tape hanging out, the wrens that moved into the bird house this spring are doing the editing on the movie.  We're not sure who's starring in the movie, nor what it's even about, but as soon they announce the date of the premier, you'll be the first to know. 

Flashback Friday

As a kid, I loved Icees.  The only problem was, the closest store that had an Icee machine was about 3 miles away, and I wasn't always able to whine and cajole my parents into driving me up to the Magik Mart to get a cola flavored Icee.  For times when I couldn't get them to take me to get an Icee, I had to rely on my Slushee Mug.  Mom and Grandma got it for me at the grocery store, thinking it would pacify me -- I could have an Icee any time I wanted one, they told me.  I was reluctant, but thought I'd give it a try. It wasn't quite like a real Coke Icee, but it was pretty darned close. 

I've talked to a few people this week who've never had the pleasure of owning a slushee mug.  Boy, do I feel sorry for them.  In case you're one of the unfortunate few, let me explain.  The slushee mug was in two parts - the white inner part that had the freezing "stuff" inside, and the outer part with the handle.  You simply froze the inner part overnight, and then pop it into the actual mug, and then pour any type of beverage into it, and after a few minutes of stirring, you've got a slushee.  Granted, I could never get mine as thick as the ones they showed on the commercial, but it was definitely slushee nonetheless and it kept me from bugging Mom and Dad to take me up to the Magik Mart.

Tarot Card Reading Wrap Up

The day is almost over, and as I look back on what my tarot card reading said, I'm pretty disappointed.  If you want to be literal about it, the only major "choice" I was faced with today was the option of either paying or not paying my Verizon cell phone bill.  I did think about it, but I have to confess that I did act selfishly when I chose to pay the bill - I was only thinking about me and how I like having my cell phone service.   I'll try the daily tarot card reading in a week or two and see if the predictions are any better.

It's In The Cards

When I signed on to AOL this morning to check my email, something on the Welcome page caught my eye - "Your daily tarot card reading."  I've never been one to read the daily horoscope, nor do I believe in tarot cards, but as I sat at my desk sipping my morning coffee I thought maybe it would be interesting to see what the cards have in store for me today.  Let's see what the cards have in store for me today:  The "Lovers" card was chosen. 

The Lovers suggest that you may be faced with an important choice today, and it is likely that one option will appear much easier than the other. Think carefully, though, before making your decision, as it is important that you act in an unselfish way. In matters of the heart, the Lovers bring hope, and they may also indicate positive relationships with friends and colleagues.

I'll report back tonight before I go to bed and let you know if I had to make an important choice today, and if the option in deed much easier than the other. 

Top Ten "I'd Rather Be . . ." Bumper Stickers

1.   Fishing
2.   Scrapbooking
3.   Playing Bingo
4.   Raisin' Cain Than Raisin Bran
5.   Coon Hunting
6.   Right Than Politically Correct
7.   Driving A Chevy
8.   Shopping
9.  Telecommuting
10. Scuba Diving

File Under: WTF?

I was scouring the Sunday sale papers like I always do on Sunday afternoon, when a coupon advertisement caught my eye.  It was for Cottonelle toilet paper. More specifically, Cottonelle For Kids toilet paper.  The headline on the advertisement said "Help kids learn how much to use."  Hallelujah!! The good folks at Kimberly Clarke are teaching our children - the leaders of tomorrow - how much toilet paper to use.  The kids Cottonelle toilet paper comes with paw prints on what appears to be four squares of toilet paper (see photo #1 above).  Then there's a picture of an adorable puppy on the fifth toilet paper square (see photo #2),  indicating that's "enough."  While sitting at the kitchen table looking at this advertisement, I actually said the words "WTF?" out loud in disbelief. 

I immediately went to the Cottonelle website, and there I found some very intriguing FAQs about Cottonelle For Kids.  The most interesting question follows:   

I don't understand how this shows children how much toilet paper to use?
Each segment of paw-prints and puppy is roughly 5 sheets long. Starting with a first paw print, the child should be instructed to follow the paw prints to the puppy then tear at the puppy. This will provide roughly 5 sheets of toilet paper, an average amount for one wipe. A new segment of toilet paper should be taken for each subsequent wipe.  

Heaven help the septic system if a child can read that FAQ - they'll be grabbing their measured five-sheets a dozen times for "each subsequent wipe."  Kids will zoom through an overpriced roll of Cottonelle For Kids faster than you'll be able to call the truck to come in and pump out your septic tank. 

I'm really baffled by this.  I thought all along that knowing how much toilet paper to use when you went to the bathroom was innate - an intuition that we're born with, just like knowing when you need to go to the bathroom.  I guess I was wrong.  The parents of today have to rely on the Kimberly Clarke corporation to "Help kids use the right amount every time."  It's times like these that make me thankful that I don't have kids. 

Hail To The Real Queen

Can you spot the Queen in the photograph above, taken just two days ago at the Kentucky Derby?  No, she's not the older woman wearing mint green with red flowers on her hat; the Real Queen is the second woman from the left.  Yes, that is none other than the Queen of Daytime TV, Susan Lucci. 

While most of the city, including yours truly, was busy getting ready for the Queen of England's arrival and all hung up on getting a glimpse of Larry Birkhead and baby Dannielynne, Susan Lucci slipped into Churchill Downs under the radar.  I was almost sick at my stomach when I found out that my beloved Ms. Lucci was a mere 15 minutes away from The Compound, and she didn't even stop in to say hello.  But that's OK - I know she was very busy that day, and I forgive her.  Maybe she'll visit me next time.

My cell phone and email inbox was bombarded with messages last night and today, from friends and co-workers wanting to make sure I saw Ms. Lucci on the Derby coverage.  I was sad to tell them I did not.  I watched a little bit of the TV coverage Saturday afternoon, but I sure didn't see her until I saw the above picture online late Saturday night. 

From the stories I've read, not many people at the Derby got the chance to actually meet Queen Elizabeth.  I have to say in all honesty, if I'd been there at the Kentucky Derby this year, and was able to watch the races from same private suite that Susan Lucci and Queen Elizabeth were, there would be no contest as to which one I would bow down to first -- Ms. Lucci without a doubt.  And if given the chance to meet just one of those remarkable women, which would I choose?  I don't think I even need to answer that one; I think you already know the answer.

Link Of The Week

As the chief editor, publisher, and head writer of TWIT, it's my prerogative to rant and rave about something if I want to - just because I can.  I don't do it too often, for fear that I would scare off some of my faithful readers.  But I've been known to get up on my soapbox from time to time when something really has me ticked off.  Not everyone is as fortunate as me to have their own online blog where they can rant and rave, but I found something this week that is almost just as effective.  Have you ever had the need to rant, but had nobody to rant to?  A cool website called IndigNation is just the place where you can let those rants out.  Visit http://www.indignation.org and you can post your very own rant and rave about whatever or whoever you want.  Just keep in mind your rant and rave will be out there on the worldwide web for all to see, so you might want to not use a name of someone you're ranting about because they could Google their name and possibly find your rant about them.  But if you don't give a rat's neck, then go for it.  Happy ranting!

Happy Derby Day

It's finally Derby Day.  I can't think of too many places in the world that have a three-week long party for an event that lasts two minutes.  All week long, I've read countless articles online about what people can do to have their own ultimate Derby experience - what foods and drinks to have at their Derby party, what to wear, how to decorate, etc.  Take it from a person born and raised in the Derby City - those writers have it all wrong.  Let's take a look at what the "experts" say about Derby and then what Puddin has to say.

In the Kentucky Kitchen

There are a few born-and-bred-in-Kentucky dishes that you'll see on every Derby party menu. The first is Henry Bain sauce. It was named after its inventor, who was the head waiter at Louisville's Pendennis Club. Bain made the sauce in 1881 as an accompaniment to wild game, and it's been a Louisville tradition ever since. A sweet, tangy, spicy concoction, this sauce is best served with beef tenderloin.

Another cornerstone of Louisville cuisine is the Hot Brown sandwich. Created by the chef of the Brown Hotel, this open-faced sandwich consists of two slices of toast topped with juicy roast turkey, tomato slices, crispy bacon and a blanket of Cheddar-Parmesan cheese sauce. The sandwich is then broiled until the cheese sauce turns golden brown.

From Louisville's Benedict Hotel comes the Benedictine, a cucumber canapé spread.

Those dishes are all well and good, and even though they were invented here in Louisville, they don't make for fun food at a Derby party. Go to any backyard or garage Derby party today and you'll find the staple of any Derby party, the hot dog.  Who doesn't love hot dogs?  Even if you've just had a big meal before you go to a Derby party, you still have room for a hot dog when you arrive.  You'll also find another local party favorite, spinach dip.  For Derby, most hostesses will go the extra mile and will hollow out a round loaf of dark pumperknickel bread and will fill it up with the spinach dip.   And I have to confess that I've never seen Benedictine sandwiches at any Derby party that I've attended.  Nor do I know anyone who would serve it at a Derby party, nor any other party for that matter.  You'll also find a Crock Pot full of cheese queso at most Derby parties. Cheese dip is another big favorite.

Derby Desserts

Dessert on Derby day can only be one thing: a rich, dense chocolate-nut pie flavored with Kentucky bourbon. The original version of this pie is trademarked and fiercely protected by its inventors, but there are several unofficial versions of it: Run for the Roses Pie, Eighth Race Pie, Thoroughbred Pie and Chocolate Bourbon Pecan Pie.

You can always count on at least one version of the Derby Pie on the food tables at Derby parties.  Truthfully, not many people like it.  Here in Louisville, we prefer plain old pecan pie like Grandma used to make.  The favorite Derby party dessert is without a doubt homemade brownies.  The fudgier and nuttier the better.  Brownies are another Derby party staple.  Lemon squares are also a popular party dessert here in the South.  But honestly, not many people eat desserts at Derby parties; they're too full of hot dogs and cheese dip.

Derby Drinks

There is only one proper drink to have at a Kentucky Derby party, and that's a mint julep. A traditional mint julep is made with bourbon, muddled mint leaves and sugar, finely crushed ice and a generous sprig of mint for garnish. Almost every state in the South claims to have invented it. The time-honored way to serve a julep is in a frosty silver goblet, but you can use whatever festive cups you like. An extra-nice touch is to trim straws so they just slightly stick out of the cup. When guests sip from the short straws, their noses will be close to the refreshing mint garnish.

I think it's safe to assume that the "Derby expert" that wrote that has never tasted a mint julip before. They're nasty, and a waste of good Kentucky bourbon.  Ask any Derby party goer and they'll tell you that ice cold Bud Light is their Derby drink of choice.  But if you're dead set on having Kentucky bourbon, pour a little over some ice and sip it.  If you must mix, pour a little in an ice-filled glass of Coke, another great Southern drink.  Or just drink an ice cold Coke by itself - there's nothing better to wash down a hot dog.  I'm not sure about the tradition of trimming down the drinking straws - that's the first I've heard of that.  But there is another Derby straw drinking tradition, however: the hat that holds two cans (or bottles).  There's a think rubber tube that goes into the can or bottle and it hangs down by your mouth so you can have easy access to your Derby beverages.  You probably won't see one of these at a Derby party, but you'll see them at the track. 

Don't Forget your Derby Hat

The Derby hat is as longstanding and important a tradition as the Kentucky Derby itself. Almost everyone at the race or any Derby party will be wearing a spectacular hat, whether costly and custom-designed or made at home with a glue gun and imagination. Ask your Derby day guests to come wearing Derby hats, and offer prizes for the most ornate, the most stylish, the most creative and the most bizarre.

I really have to disagree with the "Derby expert" on this one.  What host or hostess in their right mind would put a glue gun in the hands of their Derby party guests who have been drinking?  Or give a glue gun to someone who's not been drinking, for that matter?  Some of the worst burns I've ever seen are a result of a glue gun.  Usually, only the rich or Snooty McSnoot people wear the big fancy hats to the Derby; almost everyone else will wear a ball cap or a straw cowboy hat.  Or they'll be wearing the above mentioned drinking hat.

 

 

Flashback Friday

I was asked this week by two inquisitive faithful readers what this week's Flashback Friday topic would be.  When I told them "Earth Shoes", they had a "WTF?" look on their faces.  Both of them old enough to remember Earth Shoes, but they were having a mental block.  I told them to never fear, because after Flashback Friday, they would all they ever wanted to know about Earth Shoes.

Earth Shoes were introduced in the U.S. in 1970. They were designed in 1957 by a Copenhagen yoga instructor named Anne Kalso.  Earth Shoes were the first shoes marketed with a negative heel -- meaning their heels were lower than their raised toes.  This was to mimic the effect of walking in sand, and made for orthopedically correct posture. Tests showed that they provided the optimal alignment of the wearer's spine and pelvis, encouraging the shoulders to roll back.  In appearance, the shoes were boxy, but they sure were comfortable, especially to people like me with a wide foot and low arches. 

Earth Shoes were available in sandals, clogs, hiking shoes, fleece-lined ankle boots, and my favorite, regular lace-up shoes.  The company's sales peaked in 1974, and just three years later the company was placed in bankruptcy after a dispute with several banks.  Until recently, you could find Earth Shoes in second-hand shoe stores and thrift stores, but never fear -- they are making a comeback and can be found at just about every major online shoe store. 

I got my Earth Shoes in the late summer of 1976, as my official school shoes.  As I mentioned, I have a wide foot, and I was also very picky when it came to shoes, and when I saw the Earth Shoes at the infamous Ben Snyder's, I knew I had to have them.  I wore those shoes until my feet grew and they no longer fit, but I have to say they didn't wear out.  Mine were plain brown lace-up shoes, and I wore them every chance I could.  Back then, we didn't know they were actually good for our feet and posture; all we knew was that they were trendy.  At school, I honestly don't think they were that popular.  I know that Diva Stacy and I had them, but then again, we were always cutting edge. 

Welcome, Queen Elizabeth

TWIT would like to officially welcome Queen Elizabeth to the 'Ville.  True, she won't actually arrive in Louisville until Saturday morning, but in case she reads TWIT today or tomorrow, I want Her Royal Majesty to know that she's welcome here. 

The Queen arrived today in Virginia to celebrate the 400th anniversary of the Jamestown settlement - America's first permanent English settlement.  Virginia musicians from marching bands to Grammy-winning bluegrass legend Ralph Stanley performed before the Queen's speech to Virginia's legislature - the first address ever by Britain's crown Britain's crown to the lawmaking body it chartered in 1619 at Jamestown as the Colonial House of Burgesses.  Afterward, the queen planned to meet with some of the wounded and relatives of the 32 people killed a few weeks ago at Virginia Tech.  Tomorrow, the Queen will visit the Jamestown settlement, and on Saturday she will attend the Kentucky Derby.

I've heard a few negative and sarcastic comments about the Queen's visit on Saturday.  Some said they can't see why the city is getting all worked up over the Queen's five-hour visit to Louisville.  My answer to them is I can't see why the city, and the state and country for that matter, get all worked up and have a three-week festival for an event that lasts two minutes. 

In case you're reading TWIT, Queen Elizabeth, I hope you have a very pleasant visit to Virginia and Kentucky, and we'd love for you to come back again.  You're welcome to visit The Compound any time you'd like.  Just let me know ahead of time so we can set an extra plate at the dinner table.

The Eyes Of The World Are Upon Us

All eyes are on Louisville this week.  The Kentucky Derby is just a few days away, and Louisville is the limelight for the "greatest two minutes in sports."  In the past few years, we've gotten coverage on "Entertainment Tonight", "Inside Edition", and other celebrity news shows for the star-studded Derby parties and the celebrity attendees at the Derby. But yesterday, eyes were on Louisville for another reason: Larry Birkhead came back home with his baby daughter Dannielynne. 

There was TV coverage on all four of the local channels, plus coverage on the above mentioned ET.  I have to say I was quite impressed that Mary Hart's reporting, too.  And I'm sure there will be pictures in the Enquirer and Star this week, too. But I digress.  Last week, the courts ruled that Larry Birkhead could finally bring his daughter Dannielynne home to Kentucky.  And what a better time for them to come back home to Louisville than Derby time! Just think - this will be baby Dannielynne's first Derby.  I hope one of the family members gets her a t-shirt that says "Baby's first Derby." 

Incidentally, it was during the Derby when Larry Birkhead met Anna Nicole Smith.  They met at the infamous Barnstable Brown Derby Eve party in 2003.  Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

I Missed The Amber Alert

I saw an interesting sight on my way home from work today.  In front of me in the rush-home traffic was a 90s Mustang that caught my eye.  It wasn't the car that caught my attention, but the big writing on the rear window of the car.  There, written in white shoe polish in big bold letters for all to see was the following: "CPS kidnapped my baby!"  Now, that's something you sure don't see every day.   Had it said "For sale" or "Cold A/C", I wouldn't have given it a second glance, but when I saw the "CPS kidnapped my baby!", it sure caught my attention. 

The car sped ahead of me in the traffic, and I did my best to catch up to it so I could snoop and look inside to see who was driving, but I never had the chance.  All I could do was just let my imagination take over.  I knew that Larry Birkhead and his baby arrived in Louisville today, and from watching "Entertianment Tonight" I was pretty sure that CPS hadn't taken Dannielynn away from him, so it had to be someone else. 

On the rest of the way home, I thought about what would actually precipitate CPS to actually take a child away from a home, and I generalized that they must have done it for a good, legitimate reason.  Child Protective Services just do not come into a home and take away a child for no good reason; the child's life has to be in danger.  So after reasoning that the child that was allegedly kidnapped was being taken care of by the state, I didn't think too much about it until I got home. Then the wheels started turning again - what did the kid's parents do to make the state take the baby away from them?  Were they running a meth lab in their home?  Were they crack heads and neglected their baby? Or did they just make a bad decision that caused the state to take the baby away from them?  I'll never really know.