Don't You Hate It When . . .?

*You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them.

 

*The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle.

 

*The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.

 

*There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address.

 

*You open a can of soup, and the lid falls in.

 

*It's bad enough that you step in dog doo doo, but you don't realize it till you walk across your living room rug.

 

*There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.

 

*You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

 

*Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.

 

*You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette.

 

*You slice your tongue licking an envelope.

 

*Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.

 

*A station comes in brilliantly when you're standing near the radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.

 

*There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray.

 

*You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.

 

*The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.

 

*A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling.

 

*You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7pm instead of 7am.

 

*The radio station doesn't tell you who sang that song.

 

*You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

 

*People behind you on a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up.

 

*You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it.

 

*You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.

 

*You had that pen in your hand only a second ago, and now you can't find it.

 

*You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.