This Means War

Since the beginning of the year, a battle has been raging on between me and Rumpke Waste Removal.  It looks like they're winning the battle. 

One early Thursday morning in January, my household was startled from our long winter's nap by the loudest crashing I'd ever heard at 3:00 in the morning.  I got out bed and looked out on the road, expecting to see a wreck, but didn't see anything.  After talking to my Dad the next day about this, he said that it was the big garbage trunk emptying the dumpster at the store two houses drown from us.  At first I thought "It's January, and we've had now and ice, so maybe the truck couldn't make it's route at the normal time."  Imagine my surprise the following Thursday morning at 3:00 when we heard the dumpster truck (who will be referred to as Dumpster Man from here on) once again, pick up the dumpster and slam it 3 times. 

On my way work a few hours later, I drove by the store and looked at the dumpster and saw that it was emptied by Rumpke.  As soon as I got to work, I called Rumpke and politely told them how our neighborhood really didn't appreciate the early morning wake-up call by Dumpster Man.  They apologized and said they would see what they could do.  We didn't hear Dumpster Man for a few weeks.  Halleluliah.  Then we heard him again early one Thursday morning.  Only this time it was 4:00.  Like the later time made a difference.  I called Rumpke again, and was given a [lame] excuse that they had a new driver.  Riiiight. 

And thus the pattern continues; a few weeks of silence followed by a week of shock and awe, followed by a phone call to Rumpke.  If nothing else, I am persistant and they won't wear me down. 

A Journal Milestone

Thanks to you, my faithful readers, just a few minutes ago, my journal was visited for the 1000th time. (I'm pretty sure the honorary millenium poster was Stacy, a title she will brag about for some time.)  Some of you doubters might say "she probably went to the site herself every day and kept hitting the refresh button a hundred times."  Au contraire.  When I post an entry to the journal, or even go to view it like you all do, my visits don't count as hits on the counter.  So it's all about you!!

As Rocky the Squirrel would say, "And now here's something we hope you really like" - I have some awesome news I want to share with you: this afternoon, I received an email from the Journal Editor at AOL, saying that That'sWhat I'm Thinking has been chosen to be listed on the main page of the AOL Journals section, and it is in the running for Top 5 Editor's Picks!! How awesome is that???  And once again, I have my readers and commenters to thank. Thank you for taking the time and effort to get to my journal and read and leave a comment. 

My biggest fear is that someone will read a post and say, "Damn, that was lame."  I try my hardest to make the posts something that I would want to read.  If you have any suggestions for posts, top ten lists, or anything else, please email me or leave a comment.  I'd love to hear from you.

And as the King would say, thank you, thank you very much.

Top Ten Saturday Night Live Characters

1.  The Coneheads
2.  Rosanne Rosannadanna
3.  Buckwheat
4.  Lisa Lupner
5.  Killer Bees
6.  Church Lady
7.  The Sweeney Sisters
8.  The Widette Family
9.  Emily Litella
10. Samuri Warrior

Honorable Mention:
The Greek Cafe
Wild and Crazy Guys
Little Richard Simmons

I Stand Corrected

I found this tidbit of info and I want to publicly apologize to Stacy.

What is the difference between a Ding Dong and a King Don?

When Hostess introduced Ding Dongs in 1967, the advertising campaign included a ringing bell: hence the name Ding Dongs. However, the eastern United States Hostess opted to package the cakes as King Dons to avoid confusion with a competitor's product. Hostess consolidated the King Don and Ding Dong name in 1987, packaging the cakes as Ding Dongs in all regions. Six months later, Hostess decided to go back to using the King Don name in the eastern U.S., again, to avoid confusion with a competing product. But, today the issue has been put to rest and only Ding Dongs are sold nationwide.

 

Special Request Tuesday

I've had several requests from my devoted readers to post this picture.  Far be it for me to disappoint my fans.  So here it is, a picture of me and Frank Marino, taken last May at the Riviera Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. 

You might be thinking "That's just another drag queen."  True. But Frank Marino is the HIGHEST PAID drag queen in the world.  He has a lifetime contract with the Riviera and is the headliner at "Evening At La Cage", one of the top shows in Vegas.  Frank became popular by impersonating Joan Rivers.  In fact, he impersonated her so well that Joan sued him.  After the suit settled they became best friends. 

We had VIP seats for the show, and sat right next to the stage.  Stacy and I were just enamored with the imperonators - they were the best I'd ever seen.  I was a tad bit disappointed, however.  Frank didn't have the Joan Rivers thing going on.  But then again, after all of the plastic surgery she's had, Joan Rivers herself doesn't really have the Joan Rivers thing going on either.  And we were also surprised by the way Frank talked - his speec was borderline slurred.  We just brushed it off to him being a big Vegas star that probably did a line of coke before the show.  I didn't think any more about it until a month or so later I was looking online for some Las Vegas pictures, and came across an article about Frank Marino having some terrible, terrible illness that affected his speech.  The article told how he had undergone surgery and extensive therapy and was on the road to recovery.  The ariticle also said how a lot of people thought, like us, that he was just drunk or stoned, when he said in the article that he has never drank any alcohol nor done any type of drugs.  You go Frank. 

If you want to look online for some pictures of Frank and the rest of the cast, I recommend doing a search for "Frank Marino La Cage" and not just "Frank Marino", as there is another Frank Marino that is in the old school rock group Mahogany Rush and you'll get a ton of hits for his records and such. 

I also included a picture of the cast of Evening At La Cage - you might have seen them in appearances on Oprah and other shows.  And I included a picture that of a Barbie Doll that looks just like Frank.

Tales of the Bizarre, Part 2

Kell, this was too good to pass up - hope you don't me being a copy-blogger and using this.  The first thing that popped into my head was how this should have been in "Alice In Wonderland."

Whopping Big Mushroom Found In Europe 86-Acre Fungus Is Europe's Biggest Organism

POSTED: 2:57 pm EDT September 26, 2004

BIRMENSDORF, Switzerland -- Scientists say they've discovered a fungus spanning 86 acres in the Swiss Alps, making it the continent's largest living organism.

The Swiss scientists say the Honey Mushroom is about 1,000 years old and lies beneath an Alpine forest. They say it's only visible in the fall when its mushrooms pop up around the roots of trees.

The mushrooms aren't dangerous to humans, but they can kill swaths of pine forest.

And while it may be the largest in Europe, it pales in comparison to one in eastern Oregon that covers 2,200 acres.

Tales of the Bizarre

During the week, I have the alarm on my digital clock radio set for 6:50.  Every week day for the past month, I've awaken at 6:47.  How bizarre is that?

Y'all Come Back Now, Ya' Hear

Today marks another milestone in television history: 42 years ago today, the first episode of "The Beverly Hillbillies" aired on tv.  The show ran for an astonishing 9 seasons, and lives on today through reruns.  The show started out in black and white, and went to color at the start of its third season.  "The Beverly Hillbillies" was one of the first sitcoms to have big-time guest stars: Louie Nye, Wally Cox, Jonathon Winters, bluegrass legends Flatt and Scruggs, and even Gloria Swanson and John Wayne.  The show spawned other iconic shows "Petticoat Junction" and "Green Acres." 

"The Beverly Hillbillies" rose to #1 in the ratings faster than any other television show within the first three weeks of its debut, a feat still unmatched today. It remained at the #1 spot for three season in a row. Incidentally, the following eight episodes that aired during the wake of the JFK assassination are the most watched half-hour shows ever. 

Of all of the shows we consider as classics, "The Beverly Hillbillies" is my favorite.  The show gave us buzz words that we still joke about today.  I never look at a built-in swimming pool withouth thinking of the Clampett's cement pond (pronounced "cee-ment").  We still make jokes about a secret agent being a double naught spy.  I'm grinning as I think about putting vittles on the fancy eating table.  And we still refer to small animals and pets as critters. 

My favorite episode is where the Clampetts buy a race horse.  Unbeknownst to them, the horse is a trotter.  Granny, who considers herself an expert horsewoman, hops up on the horse and rides him around the mansion grounds.  She comes back and in despair tells Jed he wasted his money. "He's a dandy, Jed, but I couldn't get him to break out of a trot."  That just kills me.  Later on, Jed is talking to the horse's trainer, and Jed tells him that he's concerned about the animals racing ability because Granny couldn't get him to break out of a trot.  The trainer tries to explain to Jed that the horse is a sulky.  Jed looks over at the horse trailer, believing that it is the buggy the horse pulls and says "I see why he's sulky. You'd be, too, if you had to pull that heavy thing."  They don't write sit-com scripts like that any more. 

Link of the Week

Remember the "Smokey and the Bandit" movies?  They were bringing Coors beer across the country from the west coast to the east where it wasn't available.  I visited a friend in Philadelphia a few years ago and fell in love with a northeast delicacy called Tastee Cakes.  Every few months, she would send me a shoebox full of them because they weren't available here in the south.  My cousin, who used to live in Idaho, would bring back a suitcase full of Big Red because it wasn't available in the northwest.  You probably have your own story. 

This week, I found a website where you can order treats like these and many, many others.  It's www.hometown-treats.com.  Now that Coors is available nationwide, we don't have to worry about that, but thanks to hometown-treats.com, west coast sweet lovers can experience the joy that only a Little Debbie Nutty Bar can bring.  But not just sweets can be ordered from this site - you can get Chicago deep-dish pizza, New York bagels, and a ton of other cool foods.  The site is secure, so you won't need to worry about ordering and using your credit card.  Go ahead - get some Tastee Cakes today. 

 

Happy Anniversary, Herman

Please join me in celebrating the 40th anniversary of "The Munsters". 

It's hard to believe the show first aired 40 years ago.  It's also hard to believe that even as popular as the show was, it only lasted for two seasons (1964-1966).  But from my research, I found out that after it's two seasons, the network throught that monster shows were on the way out, so they cancelled it, even though the show was a monster hit, pun intended.  Other channels wanted to cash in on the popularity, so the 70 episodes of The Munsters quickly went into syndication, as they still are today. 

Last night on TV Land, I watched my favorite Munster's episode, "Hot Rod Herman."  In this episode, Eddie was bragging to a school friend that his Herman was an expert driver, and he gets Herman to compete in a drag race at the Mockingbird Heights drag strip.  Herman dresses up like Marlon Brando in "The Wild One" with a leather jacket and hat.  The funniest part was Herman's leather biker jacket -- on the back it said "The Punk Rods".(I think when I get my jacket for bike night I'm going to have that embroidered on the back.)  Herman soups up the family car, The Munster Koach, and they decide to race for pink slips but Herman loses the race AND the family car.  Lily really goes off on poor Herman, and Grandpa tells Herman to ask for a rematch.  Granpa builds Dragula, a dragster made from one of the coffins from the funeral home where Herman works.  Of course, Dragula wins and they win back the cool Munster Koach.  By the way, the Muster Koach and Dragula were designed and built by the same man that designed and built the Batmobile and the Monkee's GTO.  Pretty cool.

I got a ViewMaster for my 5th birthday, and the first slide I got for it was The Munsters, which I still have, of course.  I wanted a Munsters lunch box until I saw someone on the bus with a cool Partridge Family lunch box.  I never got either one, incidentally.

Another funny thing in the episode last night was in an attempt to sabotage Dragula, the other racer stole the car's parachute.  So when Grandpa won the race, he couldn't stop.  So Herman, still wearing his The Punk Rods leathers, grabbed onto the back of the dragster and stopped it.  The funny part was when they showed smoke coming from his boots.  Silly, yes, but it struck us as funny.  There was no talk of sex or any violence on the show - it was just mainly things so silly they were funny.  They don't make shows like that any more.  I guess that's why TV Land is so popular. 

Demon Possession

I'm Baptist, but I'm calling a priest to perform an exorcism.  My car is possessed. 

I pulled into the garage last night and was walking toward the house when something caught my attention.  I looked back and saw the hazard lights flashing.  At first I thought I might have hit the switch with my purse or something.  I pressed the button and they still kept flashing.  After pressing the button half a dozen times, they finally went off.  Five minutes later, Mom said "Your lights are flashing again." I ran out to the garage and hit the button a few more times and they went off.  This time I thought that maybe the raccoon had come back to the garage and that he climbed on the car and set off the alarm.  I came back into the house, only to have a visiting neighbor say "Your lights are flashing again."  So I went back out to the garage, and hit the button a few more times, only this time they didn't go off.  In exasperation, I popped the hood and found the fuse box and got a pair of needle-nosed pliers and took out the fuse that went to the hazard flashers.  That stopped it.  But it also stopped my turn signals.  I was fed up and didn't want to worry with it last night - it was Mom's birthday and I wanted to get back to the party. 

This morning before I left for work, I got the needle-nosed pliers back out and put the fuse back in so I could safely drive to work with turn signals.  I parked in a spot next to the office building, where the receptionist has a clear view of the car so she can call me if she sees the lights flashing.  As a precaution, I brought the needle-nosed pliers with me today just in case. 

Black Thursday, continued

I was watching Good Morning, America while I was getting dressed for work this morning, and I heard a news story that made my blood run cold:  Interstate Bakeries Corporation has filed bankruptcy.  IBC, the nation's largest wholesale baker, filed for Chapter 11 reorganization and said that they intended to survive  By now, you're probably wondering why I thought this was such blood-chilling news; IBC is the parent compnay of Hostess and Wonder Bread.  'Nuff said.

The news said that IBC had struggled for the past year with declining sales due to the popularity of low carb diets.  Oooookay.   After reading an article in today's Wall Street Journal, I was relieved to hear that Hostess and Wonder products will still be available.  Thank goodness I can still get my Ho Ho's. 

Ho Ho's are my favorite Hostess product.  King Don's will do in a pinch.  It irritated me even as a young child when people would mispronounce the cakes and call them King Dong's.  Read the box, people.  Ho Ho's and King Don's were popular because they were so cool - they were individually wrapped in aluminum foil, and Mom would put one on our lunch boxes for us to have on milk break.  Hostess cupdakes were awesome, too, as were the Fruit Pies.  But Ho Ho's were the ultimate. 

Live To Ride, Ride To Live

I attended my first bike night.  It was bad.  I can't wait to go back next Tuesday.  I'd heard about bike nights, and have driven by bars and restaurants that hosted them, and seeing hundreds of cool bikes in the parking lots looked fascinating.  So last night, I got my courage up and went to one. 

A co-worker invited me to the bike night at Benchwarmer's, a local pizza place; his son was playing there.  I'd been to Benchwarmer's a few times when his son's band played there, so I was familiar with the place.  I didn't think I fit in with the bike crowd, though - getting out of a BMW wearing khaki shorts and a Zoeller golf shirt kinda set me apart from the biker crowd.  But when I walked through the sea of bikes and into the beer garden where the festivities were taking place, they welcomed me with open arms.  I can't begin to tell you how many bikers and biker chicks said hello to me and chatted with me.  Appearance-wise, they looked rough, but they were all friendly and polite.  There were no stereotypical knife fights nor trouble of any kind.  There were a few tense moments, though, when the waitress brought out the pizzas; they swarmed around the table like honeybees on a hive.

As soon as I got home, I got online and ordered a Harley t-shirt from EBay.  I'm going to make sure I look the part for my next bike night.

 

Pet Peeve #1

There's nothing that gets on my nerves more than the sound of someone smacking or popping their chewing gum.  Unfortunately, there are co-workers that I deal with on a daily basis that are big gum chompers. It drives me absolutely crazy.  I don't even blink when I hear someone scratch their fingernails on a chalkboard - it just doesn't phase me at all.  But let me hear someone smacking their chewing gum and I come unglued. 

I'm not a gum chewer so I'm guessing that's part of the reason it bothers me so much.  It wasn't so bad in high school, because they wouldn't allow gum chewing in the classroom.  But college is a different story.  I endured classes where it seemed as if every student was smacking or cracking their gum.  Instead of smoking being banned in public buildings, I wish that gum chewing would be banned instead. 

Farewell Skeeter Davis

Grand Old Opry star Skeeter Davis died yesterday after a long struggle with breast cancer.  She was only 72.  Although she had over 50 country and pop hits, she will probably be remembered as a one-hit-wonder for "The End Of The World." It was an awesome song.  It's probably one of the saddest country songs recorded, next to "He Stopped Loving Her Today" and "I Fall To Pieces".  "The End Of The World" was one of the first songs that I heard that had a spoken line in the middle of the song.  Skeeter was a Kentucky girl, too.  She was born and raised in Northern Kentucky, close to Covington/Cincinnati in Dry Ridge. 

I was fortunate enough to see Skeeter perform at the Grand Old Opry about 13 years ago.  Garth Brooks also performed on the same Opry show, but I enjoyed Skeeter's performance more.  She sang "The End Of The World" with such feeling and emotion, not as if she'd sang the song hundreds, maybe a thousand, times before.  In honor and memory of Skeeter, here are the lyrics for her big hit. 

Why does the sun go on shining? Why does the sea rush to shore? Don't they know it's the end of the world? 'Cause you don't love me anymore... Why do the birds go on singing? Why do the stars glow above? Don't they know its the end of the world? It ended when i lost your love..... I wake up in the morning and i wonder, Why everything's the same as it was..... i can't understand, no- i can't understand, How life goes on the way it does.... Why does my heart go on beating? Why do these eyes of mine cry? Don't they know it's the end of the world? It ended when you said: good bye. Why does my heart go on beating? Why do these eyes of mine cry? Don't they know it's the end of the world? It ended when you said: GOOD-BYE........

Link Of The Week

I have a new hobby - it's called cornhole.  It's called corn toss or baggo in other parts of the country, but here in the quad-states (Kentucky, Tennessee, Ohio, and Indiana) it's called cornhole.  It's played similar to horseshoes or yard jarts, but it's alot safer.  You don't have to worry about getting hit in the leg with a cast iron horseshoe or getting jabbed in the foot with a jart; the worst that could happen is getting hit with a bean bag.  Actually, you would be hit with a corn bag. 

Anything you'd ever want to know about cornhole can be found at the American Cornhole Association's website, www.playcornhole.org.  My Dad built our cornhole platforms using plans and instructions listed on the website.  You can build your own set as we did, or you can find them on EBay.  Let the buyer beware; EBay has sets that do not conform to the ACA regulation size of 2 feet by 4 feet.  If you're handy with a sewing machine, you can also make the bags; the instructions are also on the ACA website.  I got mine on EBay because we haven't figured out how to use Mom's new sewing machine yet. 

The game is played by tossing the aforementioned corn-filled bags at a 6-inch hole in the plywood platform from 30 feet away.  Not an easy task. At first the bags felt much heavier then the regulation 2 1/2 cups of corn filling them.  As with any game, there are rules to cornhole, and they, too, are listed on the website.  You can also order very cool cornhole t-shirts and can huggies.

We tried to play yesterday afternnon, but the neighbor's black Lab Rocky kept running off with the corn bags.  After he starting chewing on an old boot, we were able to continue our game.

Kamikaze Squirrels

I think there's another cult mass suicide plot underway.  This time it involves the squirrels.  For the past couple of weeks, I've seen more squirrel roadkill than I've seen in years.  I've also seen more squirrels dart out in the road in front of on-coming traffic, hence the suicide plot.  I've seen drivers swerve if there's no traffic in the other lane, or slam on the brakes to avoid hitting a squirrel.  I've also seen drivers not swerve nor stop.  I fall somewhere in the middle.  I'll avoid hitting one if possible, but not at the expense of getting rear-ended. 

At home, I've seen the squirrels acting crazy.  They run around in circles, and jump from limb to limb in the trees.  Maybe it's mating season.  That would explain a lot. 

 

Black Thursday

Thursday September 16 will go down in history as Black Thursday in Louisville; it was the day that gas prices skyrocketed over 30 cents. 

I needed gas yesterday morning on the way to work, but I was a slacker and procrastinated and didn't feel like stopping to get it.  Never mind I pass by over a dozen stores and gas stations on my way to work.  Flash forward to Thursday evening. Imagine my surprise when I pulled into Thornton's convenience store on the way home from work and saw the sign saying unleaded gas was $1.95.  The price sign might as well have been in flashing neon like on the Vegas strip.  I needed gas so I just stuck my debit card in the slot, pulled it out quickly as instructed, and took it like a woman.  I also cursed OPEC under my breath. 

My parents relayed an amusing related story.  Yesterday morning, they went a mile up the street to Krogers.  When they pulled into the parking lot, Kroger's gas was $1.62 (including the 3 cent discount when you use your Kroger card).  When they left the store a short 5 minutes later, the price had jumped up to $1.92 (which also included the aforementioned 3 cent discount).  They both smiled at each other, since they filled up their Blazer the day before. 

Let The Bloodletting Begin

This morning at work, I wrote out my 5th check this week for co-workers' kids' fundraisers.  Yes, I'm a sucker for a good cause.  

If the kid brings the catalog/brochures to me in person, I turn into a bigger sap and will end up buying two items from them.  I want to feel like I've had an integral part in helping their kid meet their fundraising goal. I don't want the kid to tell their friends "Carla was cheap and didn't buy Shrek wrapping paper and now I can't win a limo ride to McDonalds."  If the parent/co-worker sends around the catalog/brochure, I feel obligated to buy something because I don't want my co-workers filling out the order form and not seeing my name on there and then telling everyone at work "Carla is a tight ass." 

I guess this is just my way of paying penance for all of the fundraisers I had in school, 4-H and in the youth group at church.  I couldn't begin to count all of the candy, candles, and miracle cleaning products that my family, friends, and parents' co-workers bought to help me out.  They might not have wanted the stuff, nor needed it, but they still bought it just because I was selling it. 

I'm hoping that my co-workers who extracted money from me this week will be extremely generous next week when I hit them up for a donation for the American Diabetes Association walk. 

Leftovers: Yea or Nay?

While a co-worker was patiently waiting the recommended 16 minutes for his Hungry Man meal to cook in the lunchroom microwave, we started a very enlightening conversation about leftovers.  Another co-worker (and childhood friend, incidentally) was heating up her leftover fried chicken and mac and cheese in the other microwave and told us that this weekend, after seven years of marriage, she just found out the reason her husband did not eat leftovers.  I quote his mother, aka Mother Hamilton, "He doesn't eat leftovers because I don't eat them.  When I was growing up, my mother used to warm up leftovers until they were tasteless, so I refuse to eat them now."  Riiiiight.  I didn't know that an aversion to leftovers was something passed on in a family's genes?

Oh how sad to go through life not knowing the joys that leftover turkey sandwiches can bring.  And it's a known fact that chili tastes better a day or two after you make it.  The same with soups.  Not to mention meatloaf or roast beef sandwiches. 

This story has an ironic twist to it, however - my friend said that Mother Hamilton will bring over her leftover chili,  knowing good and well her son won't eat it.  At least my friend has leftovers to bring to work for lunch. 

This Day In Zoeller Company History

Today's post was written by my co-worker Greg.  He intended to send this yesterday, but we had a lot of drama going on in the Production/Scheduling department. 

On Wednesday, 9/13/00, one of the strangest car accidents happened at the Zoeller Company.  An elderly lady was driving north on  Cane Run Road in front of the main office.  When she was in front of the company, she said another car forced her off of the road.  It's a little bit sketchy about where this "other" car was coming from.  Anyway, the only place for her car to go was into the Zoeller Company's parking lot.  Since she had already passed the entrance she made her own by driving through the fence in front of the building.  The fence flipped up and then came back down on top of Dora McKnight's car.  Dora's car received scratches to the hood and front-end.  Next, Karen Hunt's car, an expensive 2000 Volvo, received a collision with the elderly lady's car on Karen's left-front side.  The impact spun Karen's car 180 degrees so it was now facing the main office.  Then, Sheryl Wood's car absorbed the majority of the elderly lady's carnage as the elderly lady's car smashed into the middle of Sheryl's drivers' side.  Finally, the elderly lady's big day ended as her car came to a stop.  Unfortunately, it stopped because it couldn't push Sheryl's car through Rita Prechtel's car.  Rita's car was approximately one spot away from Sheryl's car.  Rita's car received damage all along the driver's side from Sheryl's car.  The elderly lady only had liability insurance with a maximum payout of $10,000.  Dora's car is the only one that survived.  Karen's, Sheryl's and Rita's cars were all totaled.

Recent EBay Purchases

• Paris Hilton DVD
• Purple nylon athletic shorts (Hanes Her Way brand)
• Red string Kabballah bracelet
• “Save Martha” t-shirt
• Autographed photo of Terri Clark
• Temporary tattoo paint set
• Autographed album  “Together Again – George Jones and Tammy Wynette” (with COA, and photographs of them actually signing the album cover 12 years ago)
• Corn-filled bags for my Cornhole game
• Metal die-cast Hot Wheels-type Tammy Wynette tour bus

Link of the Week

This past Thursday, I got the same forwarded email 8 times.  After the 6th one, I took 30 seconds out of my busy schedule and did a simple search using the MSN search engine.  Just as I suspected, the email was a hoax (this one was about signing a petition started by Dr. James Dobson to keep the FCC from taking Christian programs off of tv and radio).  I looked at Dr. Dobson's website, and he had a letter posted about the hoax, and he also had a link to an urban legend/hoax site called truthorfiction.com.  I checked it out, and that night, I must have spent over an hour reading about alot of hoaxes that I've received countless emails about over the years.  What sets this site apart from other hoax info sites is this one tells you what part of the alleged hoax or urban legend is actually true.  I urge everyone to put www.truthorfiction.com in their favorites places.  When you look at the site, go to the site's search engine and type in the word "hogzilla" and read the urban legend story.  It even has a cool picture, too. 

We'll Never Forget

I always have a great time when I go over to my best friend Stacy's home; I love just being there with her, her husband Tommy and their children Graham and Lillie. We catch up on what's been going with each other, and usually laugh over something incredibly silly.  Last night's visit was no exception, but the evening did take a serious turn when we three adults sat at their kitchen table and talked about what were doing when we heard about the 9-11 terrorist attacks.  Our parents generation did the same thing among friends when discussing "What were you doing when you heard about JFK getting shot?" and our grandparents did the same thing with their friends when discussing "What were you doing when you heard about Pearl Harbor being bombed?"

We each took turns telling where we were and what we were doing that morning - Stacy and I were both at work, and Tommy was trying to get the kids up and moving so he could take them to daycare before going to work.  We all had different stories to tell, but there were common threads that ran through them: shock that our country was being attacked, belief that the fires in the Twin Towers would be put out, disbelief when we saw or heard about the 2nd plane hitting the buildings, amazement that this was all happening, and disgust when we watched the buildings fall.  We were all three visably moved by talking about this, and reliving that morning.  But the evening didn't end on a sad note; among this reflection, we all had hope, and even shared with each other some of the happiest days we've had.  The night ended with a group hug, and a silent prayer for all of those touched by this tragedy. 

This Means War

I was the victim of a hate crime last night.  Sometime between the hours of 9:00 p.m. and 7:30 a.m., my BMW was attacked by a raccoon.

As soon as I opened the garage door this morning, I noticed our small step ladder had fallen in front of the freezer.  This didn't raise a lot of suspiscion, since the ladder is usually kept in the corner by the freezer, so I thought it might have gotten knocked over when Dad putting some things away in the garage last night.  Then I saw the sight that made my blood run cold - a plastic bucket was on the hood of my BMW.  I checked for scratch marks, only to find about 100 paw/foot/hand prints all over the car.  This means war.

I was fairly sure the prints were from a raccoon, but I saw Steve next door and asked him to confirm.  Steve and my Dad have a vendetta against the groundhogs, but now that a raccoon has attacked my car, they are taking it personally.   It's my prediction that the attacker will be caught before the weekend is over. 

We All Scream For Ice Cream

Last night, I played out every kid's (and a lot of adult's) fantasy - I had ice cream for supper.  It rocked.  And I have Aunt Dorothy to thank.

My parents and I drove out to visit Aunt Dorothy after I got home from work, with the intentions of taking her to Captain D's for supper, as Dorothy had suggested when she called Mom yesterday.  Background - Dorothy isn't a blood-relative; she's my Dad's brother-in-law's sister. But she's closer to us than most of our blood kin folk.  TMI, I realize.  Dorothy lives by one of the busiest, most congested intersections in the city and it would have taken probably 30 minutes to cross traffic to get to Captain D's.  So my Dad asked her if there was any other place she'd like to go to eat that had easier access.  She said she would love to have a banana split, and there was a Baskin Robbins a block from her condo.  We were there.  I thought my health-conscious (and diabetic) Mom would balk at the idea, but she was all for it.  She was able to get her banana split with sugar-free ice cream and toppings.  So we were all happy.  It was a good night. 

Incidentally, this year marks the 100th anniversary of the banana split (August 26, to be exact).  There is some controversy surrounding who can claim to have invented it; Wilmington, OH says they made it first, and Latrobe, PA says a pharmacy near Univeristy of Pittsburgh says they were the first.  It makes no difference to me.  I'm just glad that a century ago, a soda jerk experimented and came up with the banana split.  

Farewell, Showcase Cinemas

I don't even know why I still subscribe to our rag, the Courier Journal.  It's filled with nothing but depressing news.  Today's Courier was no different.  Not to discount the sickening news of the 1,000th casualty in Iraq, but other news bothered me, too: they're closing the Showcase Cinemas.  The Cinemas were the first movie theater complex in Louisville.  They said the reason for the closing was "loss of revenue."  They couldn't compete with the arena-style seating at the hi-tech theater complexes in the East end of town.  I think the real reason is that the theaters got alot of riff-raff from the nearby Newburg housing projects. 

The Cinemas were an institution during my childhood and teenage years.  They were expensive, so us South end kids could only go every few months.  For other movie trips, we would go to the Alpha on Saturday or Sunday afternoons for $1.50.  Going to the Cinemas was a very big deal; a special trip that we planned for.  First of all, we would have to save our allowance so we could afford to go.  Then we had logistics to take care of - making arrangements for which parents to take us and which ones to pick us up. 

Going to the movies, especially the Cinemas, was something special, not like alot of today's teenagers who take going to the movies for granted. 

 

Get Well Soon, Bill

I'm always surprised when I hear of someone in seemingly good health having to undergo emergency open heart surgery.  I was really shocked when I heard Bill Clinton had to have quadruple by-pass surgery.  My first thought was how his is an avid runner.  From what I've read, he jogs every day, and plays a lot of golf, too.  But then I also thought of how the press liked to talk about his love of Big Macs. The most startling news came when Clinton's doctors said that he was in such bad shape that he would have probably had a heart attack within the next two weeks.  Talk about a wake-up call.

I guess we probably would be as shocked as Bill and Hillary if the doctors checked out our arteries.  The news of Clinton's emergency surgery made me think twice this weekend a few times -- I made myself go do my daily walk instead of sitting in the recliner watching tv, and I passed up stopping at White Castle yesterday evening on my way home from the ballgame. 

Of Do Rags and Afro Wigs

An interesting thing happend on the way to the Bats game this afternoon.  A friend and I were driving downtown to the ballfield, and in front of us on 2nd Street was an old beat up Toyota driven by a young woman with a male companion in the passenger seat.  The woman had on a bandana do-rag, like Aunt Jemima.  Since we were in the 'hood, this was not an all unfamiliar sight.  Then things got interesting.  In one swift motion, the woman reached up and pulled off the do-rag and put on an Afro wig.  No, it wasn't a rainbow afro wig like you see over-zealous fans wear at televised sporting events; this was a regular black Afro wig.  This all took place while the woman was driving.  I give her props for her driving ability - she didn't swerve nor go the least big off course while the do-rag/wig switch took place.  Then things took an even more intriguing turn.  As soon as the woman made a slight adjustment to her wig, she pulled into the Kroger supermarket (aka Kro-Ghetto). We wanted to follow her into the store, but it was nearing game time and we wanted to get a close parking space at Slugger Field. 

My first instinct about this was "she's putting on a disguise and she's going to rob Kro-Ghetto."  I called home after the game, and Mom said there was nothing on the early news about Krogers getting robbed by a woman wearing an Afro wig.  Scenes of Foxy Brown hiding her snub nosed .38 revolver in her afro wig came to mind.  I guess she was just fixing herself up a bit before doing her shopping.

Another interesting thing happened on the way home from the game - during the 15 minute trip home from downtown Louisville, I counted 3 rugs in the middle of the road, all spaced a few miles apart.  I guess someone who moved today is going to be in for a shock when they go to unload their rugs off of the truck and they aren't there.

For you sports fans,  the Bats won their last game of the season, 7-6 over the Indianapolis Indians.  As a side note, this was the only game I went to the season when the Bats won.  After some careful consideration, I might have to re-think getting season tickets next year.  It's enough to give me a complex when I realize that they lost every other game I went to this year.

 

Link of the Week

Every city has a knickname - Louisville is the Derby City, Nashville is Music City, etc.  Every city also has native phrases that usually require translation when talking to a foreigner (translate: someone not from your city).  I stumbled across Slanguage.com - a site that lists dozens of cities and their phrases and jargon.  If your city isn't mentioned on there, they encourage you to email them with the city and the phrase and traslation.  Check out the site - it's pretty cool.  www.slanguage.com

 

Gone Fishin'

I'm very happy to report that for the third consecutive time, I'm still the undisputed champion of the fishing tournament at Coach Gate Wynde Condominium Complex.  The all day event is held every two years at our friend Jerry and Helen's condo complex.  They have about a two-acre lake, and keep it stocked.  Every two years they have a tournament to get rid of all of the bluegill/sunfish that have overpopulated the lake.  Today's tournament would also benefit the Kentuckiana Raptor Society - they were taking all of the fish caught and would use it to feed the birds that they are nursing back to health. 

Team PRP caught approximately 200 bluegill.  Not a bad day of fishing.  We were out on the banks by nine o'clock this morning; the fog hadn't even worn off yet.  Once we found our groove we were reeling them in as fast as we could bait our lines and cast back out.  A fun time was had by all. 

We had more amenities at this year's tournament -- the complex rented a PortaPotty so we didn't have to walk allllll the way around the lake to get back to the condos.  That was very handy for those of us who drank one too many cups of coffee this morning.  The PortaPotty made up for not getting trophies this year.  I'm making the suggestion that at the next tournament, we have someone bring around a drink cart. 

 

Drug Testing Day At Work

I'm copying verbatim an artical that as in the Courier Journal on Wednesday.  I tried to find it online and put a link but the Courier didn't think it was news worthy enough for their website. Plus, my scanner crapped out or else I would have scanned it and posted the jpeg. Here's an excerpt:

Headline "Man is accused of using fake penis for urine sample"

A Louisville Man was arrested on Monday after he was accused of using a simulated penis and urine reservoir while giving a urine sample in front of a probation officer. According to the arrest citation, the probation officer caught Martinez Ward with a Velcro strap holding the simulated penis, according to the report. 

I had already planned to post about this article today.  It was purely coincidental that we're having drug testing today at work.  To my knowledge, I don't think an incident like this has happened here during our drug testing.  Each employee here, from the sweepers on up to the CEO, will be picked at least twice a year for random drug testing.  They take precautions - managers stand guard in the bathrooms while we pee in the little plastic cup, and they also put blue dye in the toilet bowls.  In the women's bathroom, they put tamper-proof seals on the tank lids, and they also block off the middle stall. The only shady incident that I can remember happened 2 years ago. One of the women from the factory accidentally dropped her plastic pee cup. Yes, it was full.  Our haz mat team (one of the sweepers, wearing rubber boots and gloves) spent an hour cleaning and disenfecting the area.  The woman then said that she just "couldn't go", so she was sent downtown in a cab to the company doctor to be tested. 

After reading the article again, all I can say is that you just have to pee for yourself. 

My Dream Jobs

I knew it was going to be a bad day when I spilled my 1960's Tupperware glass full of hot coffee down my leg as I was getting into the car this morning.  It's days like this that I wish I had applied for my dream job at the pizza place down the street.  I was in there for lunch the other day and I saw a hand written sign on the door that said "taking applications for manager."  The job would be the best of both worlds -- I would get to finally utilize my MBA and get to do a job I've wanted to do since I was a kid.  Ever since I saw my first pizza being made at Bonnie and Clyde's when I was 7 years old, I aways wanted to make pizzas.  I could have worked in a pizza parlor during my teenage or young adult years, but I never did.  My grandfather said that you only regret the things you didn't do, and I guess he's right.

In the runner-up spot on my list of dream jobs is being a mascot and getting to wear a character outfit.  Yes, like the mascots for college and pro sports teams. I'd also take a job as one of the characters at a theme park.  I'd like this job for the anonimity.  Plus, I would get paid to act silly and fall down. 

Another job on my list would be a circus clown.  Come to think of it, being a clown is not that different then my current job. 

New Product Review

Has anyone tried the new Mountain Dew Pitch Black?  I'm taking a neutral stance on it.  The label says it's supposed to have a "blast of black grape and other natural flavors."  The other natural flavors overpowered the black grape, because I didn't think it was grapey at all. It wasn't bad, though, for a sugar- and caffeine-filled soft drink.  One thing was cool about it, though - when I poured some into a white paper cup filled with ice, as the soft drink foamed up, the foam was Smurf blue.  

I don't care much for Mountain Dew's other products, the orange-flavored one and the Code Red.  They shouldn't tamper with perfection - you can't beat the regular yellowish-green Mountain Dew.  I wish they would bring back the bottle packaging from the early 70's with the little Hillbilly man. 

If you want to try Pitch Black, you only have 2 months - it won't be available after October 31.