File Under: WTF?

I was scouring the Sunday sale papers like I always do on Sunday afternoon, when a coupon advertisement caught my eye.  It was for Cottonelle toilet paper. More specifically, Cottonelle For Kids toilet paper.  The headline on the advertisement said "Help kids learn how much to use."  Hallelujah!! The good folks at Kimberly Clarke are teaching our children - the leaders of tomorrow - how much toilet paper to use.  The kids Cottonelle toilet paper comes with paw prints on what appears to be four squares of toilet paper (see photo #1 above).  Then there's a picture of an adorable puppy on the fifth toilet paper square (see photo #2),  indicating that's "enough."  While sitting at the kitchen table looking at this advertisement, I actually said the words "WTF?" out loud in disbelief. 

I immediately went to the Cottonelle website, and there I found some very intriguing FAQs about Cottonelle For Kids.  The most interesting question follows:   

I don't understand how this shows children how much toilet paper to use?
Each segment of paw-prints and puppy is roughly 5 sheets long. Starting with a first paw print, the child should be instructed to follow the paw prints to the puppy then tear at the puppy. This will provide roughly 5 sheets of toilet paper, an average amount for one wipe. A new segment of toilet paper should be taken for each subsequent wipe.  

Heaven help the septic system if a child can read that FAQ - they'll be grabbing their measured five-sheets a dozen times for "each subsequent wipe."  Kids will zoom through an overpriced roll of Cottonelle For Kids faster than you'll be able to call the truck to come in and pump out your septic tank. 

I'm really baffled by this.  I thought all along that knowing how much toilet paper to use when you went to the bathroom was innate - an intuition that we're born with, just like knowing when you need to go to the bathroom.  I guess I was wrong.  The parents of today have to rely on the Kimberly Clarke corporation to "Help kids use the right amount every time."  It's times like these that make me thankful that I don't have kids.