Highlands Clause Is Coming To Town

A few weeks ago, I shared with you the lyrics to a new local Christmas song,"Shively Clause."  If you remember, I mentioned about how the radio station that played the song got into a little hot water when Shively residents called the radio station and complained.  The mayor of Shively even got into the act, and said she was going to start contacting the radio station sponsors. Well, thanks to the Shively people raising such a fuss, the song got even more attention. Well, the writer of "Shively Clause" has created another masterpiece. This time, the song is paying homage to our friends in the Highlands.  You guessed it - the song is called "Highlands Clause."  When I say Highlands, I'm not referring to people in Scotland; I'm talking about the area of town along Bardstown Road and the surrounding area.  It's a very hip place to live, and the area has some of the best restaurants in the city.  There's lots of antique stores in the Highlands, along with other electic shops and stores.  And there are also alot of eclectic and diverse people that live in the Highlands.  It was where I saw my first Mohawk and first Goth person.   I also had my first Amaretto Sour in the Highlands, too, at The Bristol, and I bought my first used record album at Electric Ladyland.  Ah, memories.  But I digress. Here are the lyrics for "Highlands Clause", sung to the tune of "Santa Clause Is Coming To Town:"

Highlands Clause

You better not drive, you better hug trees
Put down the wine and stop eating cheese
Highlands Clause is coming to town

He's not very big, he's organic fed
His outfit's tie-dyed and he never wears red
Highlands Clause is coming to town

He loves a grande latte
He doesn't drive a car
And he won't be mad about this song
Because he listens to NPR

He wears a peace sign, he doesn't own guns
He doesn't bring presents to Republicans
Highlands Clause is coming to town

His elves, they wear Doc Martens
The love the Grateful Dead
The only things they like to eat
Are burritos as big as your head

You better watch out, you better not cry
And don't complain to our managers, this is supposed to be a joke
Highlands Clause is coming to town